that was beautiful

for a beautiful, strong, amazing woman, you are one bloody insecure bint

What a fine resolution to this horror story! Buffy's ability to know herself by the end of this (with a little help from her friends) is so satisfying.

This is very difficult stuff, and easy to get wrong, but I think you got a good handle on the issues, and were able to believably present it from the characters perspective.

¡Yay! Meta-fic.

This was very good, EXCEPT that the ending shouldn't've happened yet! Lovely Spuffy!

ohhh...how sweet! i really liked how it ended.

Excellent story. Sure with it had gone that way on the show. Even a fraction!

Very enjoyable.

Wonderfully beautiful! I thoroughly enjoyed it. My top 10 definitely...

very good way to end the tale. love the lines: “The problem was never you, love. It was your taste in men. Which has improved tremendously, I might add.” fun read, thank you.

Beautiful, just amazing.

 Great story. Sooooo much better than leaving him in the alley.

I really loved his speech about how she would be his girl no matter what. Beautiful.


I did find one typo in the last chapter:  "Buffy slowly became award of the difference..." 

 Aww, beautiful, tender ending. I loved reading this story, and am looking forward to reading yet more from you!

awwwwwww.... tht was so cute!
ok, except the ending line, ur a/n, kinda shoved a lil nasty reality into my perfect world life moment.
but, twas WONDERFUL!
~liz

Oh lovely....she even said I Love You without saying it and Spike is smart enough to have gotten the message as she called out her Stupid secret revealing body.

This was amazingly tender and sweet.  The tickling and teasing were something new between them and broke a few of her  barriers I'm thinking and that helped her to finally see wha they have as more than meaningless sex.

Love that she had the sense to understand his jealousy.  I think Riley and Angel's history with HIM had as much to do with his jealousy on the show as their relationship with her.  Angels past with him and Dru made Buffy's love for him even more unpalatable and Riley's involvement with the Initiative had to rub raw wounds too. 

Lovely tie up that makes that beat down bareable.  It was never even mentioned on the show and that was many shades of wrong.

Very in character for Spike to be the one apologizing in the midst of HER apology LOL.  You really do a great job of showing them as their true selves.  Brava.

Kathleen

Love that ending - great to have Spike get those words at the end instead of the other vampire -

Very Nice Piece and lovely Spuffy beginning for future -

"As if I’m not going to remember hurting you like this for the rest of my life."

A lesson that Buffy needed never to forget -

Just a teensy disappointed not to get the bitey claimy climax, but this is certainly the way I would like the situation to have been resolved.
Very nice, thanks.

Oh - so sorry to see over so soon! Was looking forward to more.  You did end it on a lovely note though.  Many thanks, as always for sharing!

much better than buffy (or i) anticipated. very good read, thank you.

This line sounds like a mother trying to convince her kid that the new man in her life is there to stay :

“Things are going to-- they might be…different. Spike might be around more than…Look, you might just have to--”

Which makes it funny because she's talking to Xander! So glad to see her friends not judging her and bringing out their own choices as examples.

A rare pleasure to see such a fair reaction from the Scoobies.  Who'da thunk it?

Oh, wow, I love this story already.  Definitely the best take I've seen of this situation.  Can't wait to read more!

I'm not so sure that Xander would have taken it that calmly, but you're correct in that he wouldn't have had a leg to stand on if he had made a scene. I always knew that after the initial shock Willow would have understood, after all she knowingly dated a werewolf!
Glad Buffy finally stood up for herself and came clean and made it clear Spike was going to be around more.
More please.

NICE -

Wow, that went better than expected.  I'm glad to see Xander and Willow understanding of Buffy's decision.  Also, nice to see that they both realize that even though Spike's hands are bloody, he's not the only one.  Looking forward to your next great chapter!

Very, very good. I'm envious.

 don't which would be nicer, being loved like Spike loves Buffy or being able to love like Spike does. Good story.  

actual a break-through conversation, for them. very good read, thank you.

“Because god forbid that I could be putting up with you because I love you.”

She dropped to her knees beside him, biting her lip with frustration as she tried to express what she found the most unsettling thing about their volatile relationship.

“And I’ve been…been using you. Using the way you feel about me and the way you let me do anything I want – just to make…just so I can feel.”
___________________________________________________

I can't keep from thinking that the most important thing of all these tragic incident for Buffy is not what part Spike takes but what her own part is - why she is so completely filled with anger and hatred and places all those emotions on Spike.   Even if they think of themselves as using his body as "a living sex toy" everytime they have sex it is like a small murder taking place - murder to the heart and soul of another being.  

To me the question is not just why Spike allows himself to be used, my perspective was always about his tremendous capacity to love and not his capacity to be a victim. 

This episode has always represented Buffy's killing of herself, her own "death desire" - she is not only killing Katrina (they perfect metaphor of the sex toy in maid's outfit on her knees) but she is also breaking the heart of Dawn and Spike - even in the clothing that is worn by these three character, Dawn has little hearts on her pj and Buffy is shown wearing the typical Brown and Black that is worn when she is killing off her boyfriends.  She wears that Brown leather coat and black sweater and Spike wears that black shirt that has patterns that suggest the yin-yang form.

Sorry for taking up all this space - but I think this was such a huge episode and part of their story - and a part that was utterly ignored by the writers - glad that you are taking on trying to get some answers for her.

At last, 'The Talk' that Spike always wanted and Buffy always refused him. And thank goodness for Tara accepting that Spike loved Buffy and making Buffy see that it was so. She's still so worried about what the others are going to say about it though. Always so desperate for approval. Poor girl. Angel damaged her so badly.
I look forward to seeing what happens in the morning when they are discovered asleep together on the couch.....

loved it, loved it, loved it! nice to see some good spuffy conversation. and buffy doing a little admitting to her badness. and, oh, willow's having them magic issues! i totally forgot bout tht part...
love the fic, and the update. will we see dawnie figuring out in the morn when she wakes up maybe? i sooooooo want her to know. and yell at buffy for beating spiek up! =P
~liz

Buffy managed to have a pretty frank heart-to-heart there - if she can keep on doing that instead of thinking the worst of Spike, they stand a chance.  He made some telling points while letting her off very lightly.  I hope she doesn't crumble before Scooby censure.

Lovely update. Absolutely loved Buffy's hesitant affection. Some nice snuggling too. And Spike shouldn't have to pay for Angelus- hope Buffy realises this and does something right for a change. Good work.

 “So, I have to pay because Angelus is a wanker?”

It always comes back to this, doesn't it?

Great chapter, and a very good talk between S&B.

     Oh, I do luv wot you're doing with Tara. More Good Witch is all to the good

"Right now, I would say that the worst thing that’s wrong with you is that you’re still thinking about yourself when the man who loves you so much he allowed you to take out your anger on him is barely clinging to life."

Right on, Tara! :-D

Slaymesoftly, you have Buffy's character pitch perfect in this chapter, and it's about time that someone called her on her selfish behavior. If only someone had done so on the series. I'm looking forward to reading more of this story. Great start! :D

 What an intense first chapter! I tend to block out that particular episode of Season 6, so I can't wait to read where you're taking this.

really enjoyed both tara's and dawn's attitude. very good read, thank you.  great paragraph: "Having a bit of a problem...sunny disposition."

Yay Tara! Tough love was just what was needed. It's true though, on the show when Buffy was weeping and wailing about her predicament to Tara she didn't once consider the effects on Spike of her actions. It was all 'oh poor little me I must have come back wrong' and then 'oh poor little me I didn't come back wrong so I have no excuse for everything, oh poor little me I feel so bad'. Then when she broke things off with Spike it was just to make herself feel better, she didn't give any consideration to Spike's feelings... 'cos of couse he didn't have any. Yeah.. right...
Oops...sorry for the rant... LOL You struck a nerve. I really didn't like Buffy much in the latter half of season 6.

As always, thrilled to see a new fic from you.  This was a very painful chapter to read--especially the beginning. Tara's part in this chapter was wonderful, calm, yet brooking no arguments. Looking forward to your next chapter.

awwwwwwwww..... go tara! i was so sad when they killed her off. i like this rewrite. makes buffy face what she did to spike.
cant wait for more!
~liz

Now that is the way it should have gone! Glad to see your muse has been inspired again. This was awesome and I really loved Tara making her see sense. Look forward to more.

An excellent start to what I am sure will be a very interesting story for many readers.  I want to add something more comments but will come back later once I get my thoughts in better order.  This theme of Buffy and her terrible capacity for violence and anger and complete oftentimes utter self-centered outlook is such a complex part of her character and the series - ALL THAT UGLY DARKNESS mixed in with her equally enormous capacity to love and sacrifice; it all makes for such complexity - and all that same complexity is repeated in Spike as well.  

How wonderful that you have Tara, which was always a symbol of the to me of a gentle soul and a Mother Goddess be a part of beginning.   

I have been reading and listening to the Gospel of Mary Magdalene for several days now and I can't help but think of Buffy and this series which continues to have such an important impact on how I try to understand my life - the more I read and think about all this Buffy takes on such a horrible face - a horror both self-created and inflicted upon her from her main teacher, Giles - all that dogma and label after label and judgements of Good vs Evil, Souls and Blindness that became such a huge part of what their lives were founded on.  And this very scene you begin with is the culmination of all their delusion and the creation of their own monsters which they always placed on the convenient scapegoat - Spike and the demon realms. 

It was not only Drusilla that sired a vampire, Giles and the WofC created their very own demon in the dogmatic condition Slayer - a part which the creators of Buffy explored very little in the series.

Take whatever time you need and dig deep for the answers you are trying to explore with this work - It is one of the most important and profound themes ever of the series - what and why and how does the heroine and IMO, the hero, of these series speak to the inner demons which they both created and had inflicted on them by their social constructs - Of What Good Is A Soul or what Does It Signify, within the context of The Alley Scene and all the social judgments that played so a huge part in the life of this young woman and one time lovely young man and love filled vampire.