buffy's actions reflect her feeelings better than her thoughts. very good read, thank you.

"It was hard to look at him, because his face was full of things she didn't like to recall, the house on Revello, the smell of cigarette smoke, her mother's voice, the loneliness before battle, the absence after resurrection. He was still blond, still had all the little expressions that came back to her now in an inventory of past ambivalence and attraction and revulsion, ultimately so jumbled up she couldn't make a decision about them.


If she'd known he was in Los Angeles, she wouldn't have sought him out. She was sure of that."

You are breaking my little Spuffy heart - it sometimes is so tempting to forget how much their relationship was all about the darkness in both of them.

Now I feel like she's back to living in that place in Egypt! She seems to be trying to convince herself that she doesn't care bit acts as if she does. I think that after losing everything she did in Sunnydale she's tried to close off that part of her that remembers because it hurts too much.

Like the mood and Buffy's ambiguous feelings.

Spike seems almost childlike in his responses, his questions... you do his voice so well! Can't wait for more, please update again soon!