It was a bright, sunny day outside. The perfect day for strolling in the park, swimming at the lake, sunbathing, and toasting vampires. The last of which was the reason she was currently sitting next to an indoor pool. It was doing nothing for her tan, but she had gotten some reading done.
 
“I wanna do it again.”
 
Buffy sat down the book she had been reading and looked at the scene in front of her. It brought a small smile to her face. Camilla was standing on the edge of the pool with her Ariel bathing suit and her Disney princess arm floaties on.
 
“Are you ready?” she called to Spike, who was standing in the shallow end of the water.
 
“I am.”
 
She nodded before jumping as high as she could and landing with a splash in front of him. When she came up from under the water, Spike reached out for her.
 
“It’s okay, Mr. Spike. I can swim,” she told him and he retracted his hand.
 
He gave her a smile as she made her way back to the stairs. She climbed them slowly and then hurried over to where Buffy was.
 
“Mommy, come play with us.”
 
“Yeah, mommy, come on,” Spike said, sending a splash in her direction.
 
She gave him a look and then directed her attention towards her daughter.
 
“Please.”
 
Buffy smiled and got up from her chair. She removed the t-shirt and shorts she was wearing and followed Camilla to the edge of the pool. Luckily the local park’s indoor pool was unoccupied today. It seemed everyone else preferred the outdoor one. They’d had to explain to Cam that Mr. Spike couldn’t go in the sun because it would make him sick. Once she heard the word sick, she immediately said she didn’t mind this pool because she really wanted him to come. And though she didn’t say it, Buffy had secretly wanted him to come as well.
 
Another month had passed since that night on the Ferris wheel and he’d stayed true to his word. He hadn’t pushed the subject of feelings anymore and she was glad for it. She wanted to make sure she was really ready before starting a relationship with anyone, especially him, but with every passing day, it was becoming harder to ignore her growing attraction to him. Buffy had to admit that she was constantly thinking about him, and he had become even better with Camilla, if that was possible.
 
The problem still stood with the fact that he was a vampire. If she’d learned anything in the past about relationships with vampires, it was that they didn’t work. Period. And yet she had welcomed him back into her life with metaphorical open arms. They spent time together like any couple would, watching movies, going to dinner, never alone of course but nevertheless.
 
“Do it just like this,” Camilla said before jumping into the water.
 
“Just like that, huh?” Buffy said, mostly to herself.
 
“Don’t worry, I’ll catch you,” Spike said.
 
He looked her body up and down. She was still as beautiful as he remembered and he couldn’t stop his wandering eyes from noticing her every curve.
 
“You will?” she asked in a child-like voice.
 
“Promise.”
 
Buffy took a step and let herself fall into the water. She intentionally landed near Spike so that the water would splash him. When she came up, she gave him a satisfied smirk and was rewarded with a splash in the face. She retaliated and then both of them splashed at the little girl as she approached them.
 
“No fair. I can’t touch,” she whined.
 
They stopped splashing water.
 
“Sorry sweetie,” Buffy told her.
 
Camilla smiled before sending a major splash at both of them.
 
“Hey,” Buffy protested.
 
The little girl laughed and the splashing fight ensued once more. After a moment, Cam called for them to stop.
 
“I wanna jump again.”
 
“Go ahead,” Buffy said.
 
She headed to the stairs and was soon jumping into the water. Buffy backed up and turned right into the vampire behind her. Her foot slipped and she felt herself falling over. Spike’s hands went to her hips to steady her.
 
She found herself staring at a pale, wet, amazingly sculpted chest and gulped. Her eyes rose to meet his and she could feel her heart beating a tad bit faster. The way he was looking at her made her knees weak and she knew if they were alone the temptation to kiss him might overwhelm her.
 
“What are you doing?” Camilla asked, breaking them out of their trance. “We’re ‘upposed to be playing.”
 
Buffy stepped back out of his grasp. “We were just…”
 
“Making up a new game,” Spike finished for her.
 
“Right,” Buffy said nodding, though she wondered where he was going with this.
 
“What kind of game?” Camilla asked, curious.
 
“C’here and I’ll show you.”
 
She swam over to where he was.
 
“It goes something like this.” He reached out and grabbed a hold of her. “First I pick you up.” He lifted her out of the water. “And then…”
 
“Then what?”
 
“Then…” Instead of finishing, he threw her in the air and she landed with a splash a few feet away.
 
“Spike!” Buffy said, concern evident in her voice.
 
“What?”
 
She gave him a look and swam to where Camilla was coming up from under the water.
 
“Honey, are you okay?”
 
Camilla coughed and rubbed the water from her eyes. “I got water in my nose,” she said, scrunching up her nose.
 
“I’m sorry. Do you want to get out?”
 
Camilla looked almost appalled by the question.  “No way. That was sooooo fun. I wanna do it again.”   
--------------------
 
“That was so fun; we should do it again everyday.”
 
“Everyday huh?” Buffy asked her daughter as she bounced down the hall in front of them.
 
“Yes,” she said, letting out a yawn.
 
“Sounds like somebody’s had a little too much fun,” Spike said.
 
“Nuhuh.”
 
“Yeah-huh,” Buffy said, but Camilla shook her head vigorously.
 
She was trudging ahead of them, still in her bathing suit and flip flops. Buffy had replaced her shirt and shoes for the drive home and Spike his shirt. They looked almost like a family coming home from a day at the beach, and Buffy had to admit the idea didn’t scare her, as maybe it should considering their circumstances.
 
They reached Buffy’s apartment and she put the key in the lock, opening the door. She motioned for the two to go in.
 
“You two go ahead. I need to see Krista a minute. I need her to pick you up from school tomorrow,” she said the last part to her daughter.
 
“But why can’t Mr. Spike pick me up?”
 
‘Because it will be daylight,’ was Buffy’s first thought, but she answered, “Because he has things to do.”
 
“What kinds of things?”
 
“Grown-up things,” Buffy said.
 
Camilla made a noise of disappointment. “Okay.”
 
Spike gently pushed the little girl into the apartment while Buffy stepped across the hall and knocked on the door. It opened moments later and Drace, Krista’s brother, was standing there. He was an eight year old with an attitude and Buffy hoped he wasn’t in a bad mood today.
 
“What do you want?” he asked in a tone that clearly said he didn’t like having to answer the door.
 
“Is Krista home?” she asked as polite as she could.
 
“Maybe. What’s it to you?”
 
“Can I speak with her?” she asked, resisting the urge to smack that attitude off the boy’s face.
 
“I don’t think so,” he said and started to shut the door.
 
A hand reached and grabbed it, pulling it back open.
 
“Drace, you are so rude,” she heard Krista’s voice say. She shook her head and looked at Buffy. “Hey, how are you?”
 
Drace rolled his eyes and disappeared into the house.
 
“I’m good.”
 
“Wet,” Krista observed.
 
“Yeah, we went swimming.”
 
“And by we you mean…?”
 
“Me, Cam, and Spike.”
 
“Oooo. Spike huh?” she asked with a smile.
 
“Yes,” Buffy said, noting the knowing look on her neighbor’s face.
 
“Awesome. So, what can I do for you?”
 
“I wanted to ask you something.”
 
“It’s not about sex, is it?”
 
“No, it’s not about sex. I got that out of my system. I mean… that came out wrong. I didn’t mean I got it out of my system by having it, just… you know… talking about it.”
 
Krista laughed. “Okay. Then proceed.”
 
“Do you think you could pick Camilla up from school for me tomorrow? I have some errands I need to run when I get off work.”
 
“Of course. But why didn’t you ask Spike to do it?”
 
“He’s… busy tomorrow.”
 
“Uhuh,” Krista replied skeptically. “Busy helping you with your errands?” she asked, putting an obvious innuendo behind the last word.
 
“No,” Buffy said, trying to brush off the suggestion as insanity, but not managing to keep red out of her cheeks.
 
Krista just laughed.
 
“She gets out of school at three.”
 
“I’ll be there,” the girl said, still smiling.
 
“Thank you.” Buffy shook her head and walked back towards her apartment.
 
“Hey Buffy,” Krista called after her.
 
The slayer turned around, her hand on her own doorknob.
 
“It’s okay you know.”
 
“What’s that?”
 
“Letting yourself be happy. If you want something, then go for it. Don’t be afraid. Don’t worry about what might happen. Focus on now and what you want now. Don’t worry about tomorrow.”
 
Buffy just looked at Krista for a moment, sensing the sincerity in her words. And without another word, she opened her apartment door and went inside.
---------------
 
Spike and Cam were sitting on the couch watching television. They both looked up when she came in.
 
“I’m hungry,” Camilla announced.
 
“Me too,” Buffy replied. “But I think maybe we should take a bath first.”
 
The little girl made a face. “Do we have to?”
 
“Yes, we have to.”
 
“Fine.” She jumped off of the couch and came to stand beside her mother.
 
“Well, why you lovely ladies are getting washed up, I’m gonna make dinner,” Spike said.
 
“You are gonna make dinner?” Buffy asked skeptically.
 
“By make dinner I meant order a pizza and sit here and wait for it.”
 
She smiled. “Sounds like a plan.” She looked down at Camilla. “Now let’s get you in the bathtub.”
 
“Okay.”
 
They headed off to the back and Spike picked up the phone and dialed. By the time both of them emerged from the bedroom, the pizza had arrived. The three of them sat down on the couch and ate their pizza while watching The Suite Life of So and So and His Brother. Buffy caught Camilla yawning more than once and knew the girl was getting sleepy. It took her fifteen minutes to get the girl into bed, but when she finally did, she returned to the living room ready to get some sleep herself. Spike was doing his best to straighten up the kitchen.
 
“Bit asleep?”
 
“Getting there. She thinks she’s as big as we are sometimes.”
 
Spike chuckled and put the leftover pizza in the fridge.
 
Buffy watched him continue to pick up, rising off their dishes in the sink. It was what any friend would do, she told herself. Friends helped each other clean and watched each other’s kids. What friends didn’t do was have feelings of a desirous nature towards each other, like she’d had earlier in the pool. Buffy was almost certain that had Camilla not been there, she would have given in to those feelings, and from the way he had looked at her, he would have done the same.
 
She’d tried to rationalize it as they’d both been alone so long that they just longed for any kind of touch, from anyone. But that wasn’t true and she knew it. She’d been out on dates before Spike had come back into her life and not had the slightest desire to do anything except come back home. Yes, she longed for a man to touch her again, make her feel things her body had begun to forget were possible. But not just any man. 
 
“Luv? You in there?”
 
Buffy snapped out of her revere and realized Spike was waving a hand in front of her face. “Huh?”
 
“I said, you should get some rest. You look knackered.”
 
“Yeah,” she replied. “You’re right.” She ran a hand through her hair, which was still slightly damp from her shower.
 
Spike stood there, studying her tired expression.
 
“What?” she asked more self-consciously than she would have liked.
 
He shook his head, as if clearing it. “Nothing,” he replied and turned away.
 
In truth, there were no many things that he wanted to say to her, but knew he couldn’t. Telling her how he felt about her would only make her run in the other direction, possibly even shut him out of her life entirely. And he wasn’t sure he could handle that.
 
“I’ll head out so you can get your beauty rest, not that you need it.” He started to exit the kitchen when her voice stopped him.
 
“Do you ever think about the future?” she asked suddenly.
 
“Beg your pardon.”
 
“The future? Do you ever think past tomorrow? Next week? Next month?”
 
“Not much. I’d rather focus on now.”
 
“Even if you know there are so many bad things that could happen?”
 
Spike wasn’t sure where she was going with this. “There’s always a chance something could happen, Slayer. Some buggering demon out there could be unleashing hell on earth at this very moment.” He had unconsciously taken a few steps toward her.
 
“And that doesn’t scare you?”
 
“No. And it shouldn’t scare you, either.”
 
“Of course it should. In case you forgot, I have a daughter now. It’s my job to worry about things like that. I have to do everything in my power to protect her.” She didn’t know where the sudden rush of anger had come from. She’d been all calm not thirty seconds before.
 
“I’m not saying you shouldn’t. But worrying about every little thing…”
 
“Maybe you only have to worry about yourself,” she interrupted, “But some of us have other obligations.”
 
Spike could feel his own anger rising now and struggled to keep his voice down. “What the bloody hell is your problem?”
 
“What is my problem?” she asked, stepping closer and putting a finger into his chest. “You are my problem.”
 
“And what is it exactly that I did to get your knickers all in a twist?” he demanded.
 
“My knickers are just fine, thank you,” she replied.
 
“Then could you tell me what’s suddenly stuck up your arse?”
 
Buffy’s hands, which were now balled into fists, ached to punch him. In fact, her whole body ached to make contact. It had been years since she’d had a good spot of violence and it took all of her control not to unleash all her frustrations on his face.
 
“Get out of my apartment.”
 
“Or what?” he challenged. If she wanted to play it like this, he was ready and willing.
 
His face was mere inches from hers and he could feel her hot breath on his face. Her heart had begun to pound as she contemplated her next move. She could sock him in the nose, or any other number of body parts, she could grind out some threatening reply that would hopefully run him out or she could just walk away, go to bed and try to sleep off all of her frustrations. But she didn’t do any of those things.
 
Spike prepared himself for a blow that never came. He’d been ready for her to hit him, ready for her to yell and curse at him, ready for her to say it was time for him to get out of her life permanently. What he wasn’t ready for was what she actually did do.
 
Her lips crushed against his with a force that startled him, but only for a moment. It took his brain all of five seconds to register what was happening and for his lips to respond to hers. The kiss, despite its original urgency, began to slow as the two explored each other’s mouths. Spike had instinctively pulled her closer, her body now pressing into his. His hands gripped her waist as hers settled on his arms. Buffy it felt like a fire had been lit inside of her, one that she never wanted to put out. If her brain were now working properly, she may have realized this was probably a mistake and pulled away. But the growing intensity of the kiss prevented those stupid rational thoughts from clouding her brain.
 
Neither of them saw the little girl standing at the end of the hallway.
 
“Mommy,” she called.
 
Buffy immediately pulled back from Spike, and put her hand to her mouth as she looked at her daughter.
 
“Camilla, honey, you should be in bed,” she managed with a slightly cracking voice.
 
“I’m not sleepy.”
 
Buffy ran a nervous hand through her hair and walked towards the little girl. “But you will be in the morning, when it’s time to get up and go to school.”
 
Buffy hurried her back to her room, wondering how much of that she had seen and also wondering what the hell had just happened. When they got into her room, Camilla jumped back into the bed. Buffy tucked her back in and sat down on the bed.
 
“Mommy, do you love Mr. Spike?” Camilla asked suddenly.
 
Buffy coughed, surprised by the question. “What?”
 
“You were kissin’ him, and you told me that you only kiss boys if you love them.”
 
Buffy opened her mouth, but wasn’t sure what to say.
 
“Well, I love him,” Camilla said, “He’s real nice to me, and he bought me Lola. I think you two should get married.”
 
The slayer’s eyes widened. Her daughter loved Spike. That was going to make this already strange situation even stranger.
 
“He can be my new daddy.  I don’t mind.”
 
Buffy still couldn’t manage to form any words.
 
“But don’t worry, mommy. I still love you the mostest.”
 
“I love you, too, sweetheart.”
 
“I know,” she said yawning. “I think you are right. I am sleepy.”
 
“I’m always right.”
 
“Goodnight mommy.”
 
“Night.” She placed a kiss on her daughter’s head and then turned out the light in the lamp on her bedside table.
 
Her hands were almost shaking as she reached for the doorknob that led back into the small hallway. Camilla loved Spike and wanted him to be her new dad. And she had just kissed him, no, made out with him. And it had felt so good. But now that her brain had begun to clear itself from the haziness of lust, Buffy could only think ‘Oh God, what did I do?’ And more importantly, ‘Do I wanna do it again?’ Lest she forget Camilla’s question, ‘Do you love, Mr. Spike?’
 
I don’t know. Yes. And… maybe.
 
And what was she going to say to him? After all, she’d been the one to start all of this mess. She’d implied she wanted him in New York, she invited him to spend time with her and Camilla, she kissed him first…
 
She’d tried to turn that desire she felt for him into anger, but it hadn’t worked. The only thing it had done was bring them even closer than before. Buffy took a deep breath, steadying herself. She needed to face this now, even if she had no idea what she was going to say.
 
She made her way back to the living room, ready to talk about what had just happened. What she found was an empty room and no Spike.
------------------