A/N: I was reading the tag, and going by what was said, decided that this story is appropriate to post on this site. Hope that the mods agree! Happy Holidays!

Also Note: This story contains some references to events that take place in my holiday fic (Not Quite) Home for the Holidays. Reading that story is not necessary before reading this.



The Christmas Gift

It was a place she had never really thought she would be. Then again, she was at a place in her life that she hadn’t expected either, so perhaps it shouldn’t have surprised her. She liked to think that she hadn’t changed much over the years. She was still the same Buffy she had always been. But she felt older. She felt a lot older. It was hard to remember the carefree girl she had been before she was Chosen. Hard to remember the years spent patrolling on the Hellmouth, back when she believed that there was only one Chosen one. Back when she was the only one.

When she was younger, she had always wished for companions to share her burden. Whether it was Angel, Willow, Xander or even Faith…and of course later on there had been Spike. She had always wanted someone to share the night with, for the night was her life.

Now that there were literally thousands of slayers the world over, she discovered too late that she had enjoyed the company of her friends, because they were her friends. Not because of the help they could supply on demand. She had found that she could be surrounded by a dozen sister slayers and still feel alone.

She had decided that she would make a New Year’s Resolution to finally quit the council and everything Slayer related. She had dedicated more than half of her life to fighting demons and leading others in that fight, and she had finally had enough. She was ready to settle down to that normal life she had always envied.

Unfortunately she was finding now that she didn’t quite know how to do that. She had never finished college. Never held a real job that wasn’t for the Council. (The counseling thing in Sunnydale didn’t really count, and well, there was the time she had spent working at the Doublemeat, but she really had no intention of going back to that!) And so she had never learned to do anything besides fight the good fight.

But she was determined not to go back. She had stayed with Dawn and her husband for a while, but that was growing old. She needed a place of her own, and some direction to her life. She thought maybe she’d try to go back to college and see what appealed. Maybe find that ‘normal’ boyfriend she’d always said she wanted, settle down and have a half dozen or so baby slayers.

But aside from the few dollars she had managed to save over the years, she had no way to support herself. With Giles gone, she was no longer someone special. She was only one of many now, and so to the new Council, she no longer warranted special treatment. No one had ever thought of offering a retirement plan for the few Slayers that managed to beat the odds and live long enough to want to try something new. And so here she was. She wanted to start over, but didn’t have the financial wherewithall or the gumption to do it on her own.

And so she stood on the pavement outside the fancy store on the day before Christmas, gazing at all the beautiful things on display in the window that she knew she would never have. But most of all, thinking about the box in her hand, and the memories that went with it.

She wasn’t at all sure that she was ready to part with this last remembrance of Spike. Even worse, she was terrified that what he had told her all those years ago would turn out to be a lie. She knew that on occasion he had tried to hide his feelings, and lied about his past. But she also knew that he’d never lied to her about anything important. She had trusted him, especially towards the end. She didn’t want to know it if her faith in him had been misplaced.

Spike had told her that the gemstones and diamonds in the necklaces he had gifted all the girls with that holiday in Sunnydale were real. So, however improbable it seemed, if she trusted him, believed in him, then it must be true. He had told her that he hadn’t stolen the jewelry either, and so she had to trust that he had told her the truth. That he had given Buffy, Dawn, and each of the Potentials something valuable that night. Something just this purpose. Something that they could sell it when they needed cash.

“More portable than even cash, won’t burn or be easily destroyed.” He’d said something like that at the time. She kept telling herself that it was what he would have wanted, but it was still going to be hard to do. To sell something that had become so much a part of her.

Not that she had worn the necklace much. It wasn’t the kind of thing one could wear out in public everyday. Maybe if she were going to the Academy Awards. But although she had lived in L.A. for a time, before finally settling here in London, she had never been invited to any fancy Hollywood parties.

After that night in Sunndale, she had worn the necklace to Dawn’s wedding, and that was about it. Spike had given Dawn a sapphire and diamond necklace on the same night. Towards the end, at that last big party with all the Potentials, before things had gotten really bad. Dawn had worn the necklace on her wedding day as the “something blue.” Neither had discussed it ahead of time, and they had both teared up a little at seeing one another wearing Spike’s gift. Symbolically, Spike was present at Dawn’s wedding. Buffy knew that he would have liked that.

Buffy was grateful when it had finally gotten so late that the store was no longer crowded. The store bore the same name as the name on the box the necklace had come in, so she hoped that it was the same chain where Spike had purchased the it originally. She was hoping that they would be able to give her some idea of how much the necklace was worth, and give her some suggestions as to where to sell it.

It was cold inside, but the clerk seemed friendly. She had been afraid that he might be a little snotty, since she probably didn’t look well to do enough to actually shop here.

“Perhaps you would be able to help me,” she began tentatively. “I received this as a gift some years ago, and wondered if it was originally purchased here?” She took out the box and handed it over to the salesperson.

“Well, it certainly is our packaging.” He opened the case to reveal the shining necklace hidden within. It seemed to Buffy that he blinked a few times, and was a little bit more respectful when he looked up again. “This looks like it was a one of a kind item. May I inquire as to why you want to know more about it? I am sure that our jewelers could make up a set of matching earrings, if you’d like.”

“Umm, no,” she prevaricated. “I was thinking more along the lines of finding out how much it’s worth, so that I can sell it. I’m thinking of going back to college, and some cash would be handy…” She was rambling. This man didn’t care what her plans were. She just needed him to verify that the necklace was actually valuable, and she’d be on her way.

“Of course, but we don’t generally buy jewelry here. We sell it.” He answered briefly. Then he seemed to think again, “But a piece like this might have been inscribed and registered with us, and I can at least tell you what you have so you can make sure that you get a fair price for it.”

“Registered? What does that mean?”

“Nowadays, most high-end diamonds are engraved with a serial number, so they can be identified in case of loss or theft. If this necklace was one of ours, it seems likely that these stones would have been so marked. It may also help prove that the diamonds are in fact yours to sell, which any reputable auction house would require, since you don’t seem to have a receipt.”

“You think I stole them?” Oh god – what if Spike had stolen the necklace? Would this man confiscate it? Would they try to arrest her? Maybe she should have thought this through more fully. She had considered that the necklace might be fake, or that it could possibly have been stolen, but not that she would have to prove that she was the legitimate owner. How could she do such a thing? It had been a gift. It’s not like she’d ever gotten a receipt.

But it was already too late. The jeweler was already looking at the central diamond with his eyepiece. “This is lovely. Stunning really.” She wasn’t sure whether it was her imagination, but the clerk seemed to look at Buffy a little differently. “I think you would be best off to take it to an auction house, like Sotheby’s. The styling is classic, and the gems themselves are very high quality. I am sure that you would find a buyer. I can also see the serial number. You don’t mind if I look it up in our computer, do you? It will give us more information than I can ascertain without taking the stones from their setting.”

“No. Please, see if you have a record of it. It would have been purchased around January of 2000.”

It only took a moment’s typing on the computer. “Here it is. All registered as it should be. But did you say 2003? You must be remembering wrong. It says here that it was sold in our L.A. store towards the end of 2001.”

Buffy’s head was whirling. The computer must be wrong. That was the year she came back from the dead. The year she was working at the Doublemeat. The year she and Spike…

“I’m sorry my dear. Perhaps the necklace went through a few hands before it came to you. It says it was purchased by a William St. James and is registered as a gift for a woman named Elizabeth Summers. Do you know them?”

Buffy was turning pale. “Yes, that’s me. I’m Elizabeth Summers.” William St. James? Was that his real name? No wonder he hadn’t told anyone.

“Well, perhaps you are right about the date, and the records here are wrong. The clerk who filled this out must have been very careless. They give Mr. St. James’ date of birth as June 21, 1854. That has to be all wrong.”

Suddenly Buffy was very interested. Here was more information about Spike than the Council had been able to amass in more than a century. “What else does it say? Does it give more information about…about William?”

“Of course. We like to keep records on all our best clients. It says he bought another necklace about the time you recall. Maybe you got the two confused? Oh – that had sapphires in it as well. Clearly a different piece. Hmmm, that’s curious. Although both necklaces were bought in Los Angeles, Mr. St. James lists a permanent address here in London. Rather odd altogether.”

Vaguely Buffy could hear herself agreeing with the man. Inside, her head was reeling. 1998 was the year that she came back from the grave. The year that she and Spike had begun… well, whatever type of relationship they’d had.

She remembered that he’d told her that he could her get money. She hadn’t even wanted to listen. At the time she had assumed that he meant he’d go out and steal for her, or worse. She’d thought that she had to take care of herself and Dawn all alone.

But, if the computer records were right (and despite what the clerk thought 1854 sounded about right), Spike had apparently purchased the necklace in 2001, just before her birthday. And then not given it to her until more than a year and a half later. Sometime after he’d come back from Africa with his new soul.

He’d given them all jewelry the night of the party. Necklaces for her, Dawn, and all the Potentials. She’d barely even looked at it then. Had never even said ‘Thank you.’ She would like to think that it was because she had been too preoccupied with the battle against the First, but she knew that wasn’t true. She was just used to taking things from Spike; whatever he was willing to give.

And she had been unsure what kind of relationship she wanted with the vamp who’d gone to the ends of the earth for her. Despite all he’d done for her, and how much he had loved her, she’d rarely even been civil to him, let alone polite. If she had it all back and a chance to do it over again, things would be different. Knowing now what her life was like without him, she would never take him for granted again. But that was not going to happen, and she needed to move on with her life.

Spike had told her that the jewelry was his way of providing for Dawn and the others. He’d never said a word about having had this gift tucked away somewhere for the past year. She’d just assumed that it was something he’d done all at once, at the same time as he arranged for the rest of it, and hadn’t thought much more about it. But from the clerk’s reaction, she had probably underestimated Spike, again.

Guiltily she realized that she probably would not have accepted such a gift if she had really looked at it, or if it had been directed solely at her. Somehow by giving them all some type of jewelry for the party, that had made it seem more acceptable. Perhaps that’s why Spike hadn’t given it to her sooner. But that didn’t make sense. He had bought it for her, after all. What had changed?

Then it came to her. Their brief affair had always been tumultuous, and Buffy had tried to sever their relationship almost every day. Just before her birthday, she had beaten Spike and left him outside the police station when she thought she’d accidentally killed that girl, Katrina. She’d never even really apologized to Spike for that. And then Riley had breezed back in and out of her life, and she had finally told Spike that their affair was over, and stuck to it. No wonder he hadn’t given her this birthday present.

She’d never slept with him again after the night Riley had found them together. Not even towards the end, when they had gotten close again. She had almost gone to him the night of the party, and again the night before the final battle. But she had gotten scared. She had always thought there would be time. That they would do it right the second time around. She hadn’t expected Spike to die before she could finally decide what she wanted from him.

The jewelry clerk was trying to get her attention again. There was another man with him. “Ms. Summers, if you’d like, we can give you a copy of the purchase receipt. That will give you a better idea of how much you should insure the necklace for. If you like, we could update our appraisal on it – these pieces are rare, and the price of diamonds of this quality has risen. Or perhaps we can be of mutual assistance to one another. I understand that you need to raise some cash. Might I inquire as to how much you were hoping for?”

“Huh?” Buffy came out of her own thoughts slowly. “I thought you said that you don’t buy jewelry?”

“Under normal circumstances, we don’t. But I am the owner of this shop, and as I said, these diamonds are a rare color and quality that’s become quite the rage. I couldn’t offer you full price for it of course, but I have an idea, if you will agree to it.”

Buffy’s head was still spinning. She had taken a peek at the computer screen, and she was sure that she had misread the purchase price. The clerk, no, the store owner, was still talking. She’d missed some of it.

“It really is exquisite. The necklace was restyled from an antique, with a few new pieces added. Did Mr. Holmes tell you that? That makes it even more valuable. It has a provenance. The original piece was made during the Victorian era. If you look closely, you can see here where it has been re-styled and these pieces have been added on to it.” Buffy just looked at him blankly. Her eyes were still a bit teary. “I can see that the piece has some sentimental value to you. My idea is this. It would be possible, I mean depending on how much money you are likely to need, well, you wouldn’t have to sell all of it. See, if we just took off a few of the newer additions, see these dangles here, near the shoulders? You’d still have the majority of the necklace intact, as well as some cash in hand.”

She perked up again at the word cash. “How much?”

“For these two end pieces here,” he gestured towards the last two filigrees at either end of the necklace and she realized that he was right. If they were gone she wouldn’t even miss them. She’d still be able to wear the necklace for weddings, not that there were likely to be many more of those in the near future, but Buffy wouldn’t be surprised if there was a Christening coming up soon in Dawn’s future.

The man was doing some figuring with a calculator on the counter. She gasped as she heard the number offered. “Of course it’s not nearly as much as you would get if you auctioned it. And the piece as a whole of course is worth considerably more than that…”

“Do it.” Her reaction was immediate. “But I want a copy of that original receipt to keep.” Her inner voice warned her to give the clerk a reason that he could understand. If she started babbling about Spike, he might think she was crazy. She couldn’t just come out and tell him that she wanted to see Spike’s full name and birth date in print. Now that she thought of it, the clerk had already given her a reason, which she would have realized if she’d been paying attention to anything besides her own thoughts. She’d have to advise Dawn to insure her own necklace.

“I’d like the print out so I can document the piece. So I’ll know what it is that I have – for insurance purposes.”

No, not so I can see what Spike said about himself. If I can verify how he really lived and died. Was he really born in London in 1854? Was he really William St. James? God, he’d even given an address. She could see whether it was real or not. Whether the world still had a trace of who he had been, where he had lived, who he had been in life.

As she clutched the cashiers check in her hand, she looked carefully at the piece of paper that came with it. William St. James. She realized then that Spike had given her something more valuable than these diamonds. He had given her a rare glimpse of his true self. Had Spike really been rich the whole time? If so, why had he never let her know that? And what was she going to do with herself now that she was a woman of some means? Would she sell the rest of the necklace? Lose the last tangible thing she had to remember him by? She knew it was just another possession, but she didn’t have anything else – not so much as a picture of him.

She smiled a little sadly as she walked out of the shop. She’d still trade it all to have Spike back beside her.