full 3/4 1/2   skin light dark       
 
 
Chapter 6
 
<<     >>
 

“I just don’t think it’s a good idea, Buffy.”
 
“Well, I’m sorry that you don’t think it’s a good idea. Guess you should have thought about that before.”
 
He took a step closer to her. “You know I’m right about this. It would be better for both of us.”
 
“You mean better for you.”
 
“Look, Buffy, I can’t raise a kid. I have my career to think about.”
 
“So, you’re saying your career is more important than a child?” she asked, not believing he could really feel that way.
 
“Yes.”
 
Buffy’s mouth dropped open. “How can you say that?”
 
“When we started dating, I thought it would just be something on the side. But the more I got to know you, the more I really started to care about you. And this, what we have here, it’s great. And why ruin a great thing? And you have your career to think about. You wanted to go back to school, right?”
 
“I cannot believe I’m hearing this,” Buffy said turning away from him. How could he think that jobs and school were more important than a baby?
 
“You have to get rid of it.”
 
“No, I won’t do that.”
 
“Yes you will,” he told her sternly.
 
She turned back to face him. “No, I won’t.”
 
“You don’t understand, sweetheart. I’m not asking.”
 
“I can’t believe I ever trusted you,” she said as she started walking away from him.
 
He grabbed her arm. “Well, you did. And I know you still love me, baby. You need me, remember? You’re afraid to be alone. And you don’t have to be, as long as you take care of this little problem.”
 
The look on his face made her even angrier than she already was.
 
“The only problem I have is you,” she said pulling her arm out of his grasp.
 
“I won’t be your only problem if you don’t do as I say.”
 
“And if I don’t?” her tone was low and threatening, but he didn’t seem bothered by it.
 
“Don’t act like that.” He stepped closer to her and put his hand on her cheek. “This is for the best.”
 
She pulled back abruptly. “Go to hell.”
 
This seemed to piss him off. “You are not gonna do this to me,” he yelled.
 
“Watch me.”
 
He raised his hand as if to slap her and she grabbed it.
 
“I’d think twice before doing that.”
 
She bent his hand backwards, and he cringed in pain. She bent it a little further, hearing a satisfying crack before letting him go. He pulled his hand to his chest.
 
“You crazy bitch.”
 
“Don’t you ever try to hit me again.”
 
“Oh, don’t worry. I won’t, because it’s over. I’m outta here,” he turned and headed for the front door. “You are nothing to me. And that baby is nothing to me. I want no part of it,” he yelled, slamming the door behind him.
-------------------------
 
Buffy opened her eyes and sat straight up in the bed. She remembered the night Martin had left and never come back all too clearly. It had been one of the more painful events in her past. She had loved him, in a way, but worse than that, he had left her to raise a baby on her own. It had been five years since she had last seen him, and he still haunted her dreams.
 
She ran a hand through her hair and pushed the covers aside. A look at the clock told her that it was already after nine. Her daughter’s party was supposed to start at noon and she still had to get everything ready.
 
“Mommy.” A moment later the owner of the voice came running in the room. “It’s my birthday.”
 
“Yeah, I know.”
 
“When is everybody coming?”
 
“In a little while.”
 
The little girl looked like she was ready to bust with excitement. “What time is Mr. Spike coming?”
 
After the dream she’d just had, Buffy didn’t want to think too much about Spike. It seemed that every relationship she’d ever had had ended badly.
 
“I don’t know, sweetheart.”
 
“I told-ed him to be here early cause Mina can’t be here the whole time and she wanted to meet him.”
 
“He’ll be here.”
 
She made a squeal and jumped off of the bed. “I have to take a bath,” she said, running out of the room.
 
Buffy sighed. It was going to be a long day.
------------------------
 
Dawn and Eric arrived early with the balloons, followed closely by Spike. They helped Buffy finish getting everything set up. Giles arrived not long after that with Willow and Xander. Camilla’s friends showed up with their parents, mostly mothers, at party time. Everything was going smoothly so far.
 
“Bloody buggering hell,” Spike said waking into the kitchen.
 
“What is it now?” Buffy asked, turning to look at the vampire.
 
The party had been going on for over an hour now, and she hadn’t seen much of him. He’d been the center of attention for both the children and the moms. She had to admit that it bothered her some to see him casually flirting with some of them, but she knew he was just trying to be nice.
 
“That little red-headed one threw up on my shoes.”
 
Buffy laughed and handed him a washrag. “I told you not to let him eat all that candy,” she said.
 
“Yeah.”
 
In all of his life and unlife, Spike had never spent this much time around kids. And as far as he could tell, they were all little soul sucking monsters from hell. Three of the little girls had followed him around most of the day, playing 20,000 questions.
 
‘What’s your name?’
 
‘Can I try on your coat?’
 
‘Why is your hair that color?’
 
‘How old are you, cause Cam said you were a hundred?’
 
He was about ready to stake himself. He’d thought, more than once, about vamping out and scaring the crap out of the lot of them, but he figured Buffy and the other parents wouldn’t appreciate that much. He’d also been avoiding Mrs. Lawson, who’d asked him her own questions. Apparently, she and her husband were separated and she was very lonely. He also suspected she was a teensy bit pissed from the smell of her.
 
He wiped his shoes off and threw the rag away. He started to reach for the crackers when Buffy’s voice stopped him.
 
“Wash your hands.”
 
He rolled his eyes, but did as she instructed. “Why are you hiding out in here anyway?” he asked.
 
“I'm not hiding out, I'm preparing.”
 
“Right.”
 
In truth, she was hiding out. She wasn’t in the mood to face some of those moms that she knew would be out there. They would look at her like she was a failure for not having a husband like they did. It wasn’t like it was Stepford or anything, but unmarried women in this town always dated if nothing else.
 
“Well, you’re gonna have to get out there. Bit says it’s time for cake.”
 
“She only wants cake because it comes before presents.”
 
“That may be true, but if those little buggers don’t get cake soon… even I’ll be scared of the consequences.”
 
Buffy laughed and shook her head. She picked up the cake and instructed Spike to light the candles. They then walked into the living room.
 
“Cake time,” Buffy announced.
 
The children cheered.
 
“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Cammy, happy birthday to you,” everyone sang.
 
The little girl smiled brightly while they sang.
 
“Now, make a wish and blow out the candles,” Buffy said.
 
Camilla closed her eyes and after a moment, she opened her eyes and blew out the candles. Everyone clapped.
 
“What did you wish for?” Buffy asked.
 
“I can’t tell you, mommy. It won’t come true.”
 
“Oh… right of course,” Buffy said with a smile, though she really was curious as to what her daughter had wished for.
 
She proceeded to cut the cake and hand out pieces to all of the children. After cake, Camilla opened all of her presents. She was thrilled with the dolls and movies she received, but was most excited with the gift from her mother. A Cinderella television. It had taken Buffy a long time to find one, but now all of her trouble was worth it.
 
“Thank you, mommy, I love it.” She ran over and hugged Buffy.
 
“You’re welcome.”
 
Camilla then thanked everyone else for their gifts before insisting they play a game. The adults made their way around the edges of the living room while the kids played. Buffy returned to the kitchen to wash a few dishes. Spike joined her once again trying to get away from everyone.
 
“Spike, could you make some Kool-Aid?” Buffy asked. She noticed the bowl was running low.
 
“Uhh… sure.”
 
She handed him a pitcher and a spoon. He looked at it and crinkled his forehead. He had never made the stuff before, but it couldn’t be that hard now could it? The package had instructions. Pour contents into large plastic or glass pitcher. He opened the small packet and dumped it in the pitcher. Add 1 cup of sugar. He looked around but didn’t see any sugar. Oh well, how important could it be? Add cold water to make 2 quarts. Mix thoroughly. Spike filled the container with water and placed the lid on it before shaking it.
 
Buffy watched in amusement while he shook the pitcher. He looked almost cute trying to make the juice, sexy even. Hell, who was she kidding? He could look sexy reading the dictionary. The dream she’d had last night suddenly made its way into her mind and her smile faded. A relationship was not what she needed right now.
 
Spike felt a tug at his leg and looked down to see the red-headed kid pulling on his pants. He pulled back instinctively.
 
“What did I tell you about the shoes, mate?”
 
“No… we need more chips.” And with that said he ran back to the living room.
 
He watched the kid go before turning his gaze to the slayer, who was up to her elbows in dish water. She wiped her forehead on her sleeve and looked at him.
 
“We need more chips,” he told her.
 
“I can’t do this.” She put down the plate she was washing and dried off her hands.
 
“You can’t get chips?” Spike asked confused.
 
“No, I mean I can’t do this, with you,” she motioned between them, “This is crazy. We haven’t seen each other in years. Things aren’t the same, and we can’t just pick up where we left off.”
 
He was a more than a little surprised by her outburst. Is that what she thought they were doing? Picking up where they left off? He thought briefly about informing her that if they were picking up where they left off then he wouldn’t be sleeping down the block, but by her side, and immediately decided against it. Until this moment, Spike hadn’t even realized she’d been thinking about him like that at all. Yes, they had been getting along well the past few weeks but neither had even made the slightest move to touch the other, much less anything else.
 
“I’m well aware of that, luv.”
 
“We can’t be more than friends.”
 
“Who suggested otherwise?” He was still very confused.
 
“I’ve just been thinking about what’s been going on between us lately. I mean you move all the way here after seeing me two days, you baby-sit for me, we go out for pizza, and now you’re making Kool-Aid at my daughter’s birthday party.”
 
“If I recall correctly, you ask me to make the Kool-Aid, Slayer. And I didn’t move here so that we could get back together.”
 
“Then why did you?”
 
“Bloody hell if I know,” he said, feeling his frustration building. “I s’pose it just felt right. But I don’t expect anything from you, if that’s what you’re thinking.” He took a step closer to her. “Buffy, I still have feelings for you. I think I always will. But that’s not why I’m… making Kool-Aid. But if me being here makes you uncomfortable, then I’ll leave.”
 
“I don’t want you to go. I just… I wanted to make sure we were on the same page.”
 
“If you want us to be on the same page, first you’re going to have to tell me what book we’re reading.”
“The book of friendship,” Buffy replied lamely.
 
Despite his irritation at her bad timing, Spike felt a tugging at the corner of his mouth. “And do they carry it at the local library?”
 
Buffy felt a slight smile appear on her own lips. “I wish. Then we could see how it ends.”
 
 “If you knew how it would end, tomorrow wouldn’t be nearly as interesting, would it?”
 
“No, I guess not.”
 
Spike turned back to his Kool-Aid.
 
“I’m sorry,” Buffy said. “For bringing it up like that. I just didn’t want you to get the wrong idea.”
 
“Don’t worry, Slayer. My eyes are still clear.”
 
Buffy thought back to when he’d last spoken those words to her. She’d been about to go on a date with Robin. They’d had an awkward run-in, literally, in the hallway and he’d tried his best to compliment her without offending her. She remembered how on egg-shells Spike had been around her almost that entire year. He seemed to be more relaxed now, but Buffy wasn’t entirely sure that was a good thing.
 
She’d told him once that she was tired of playing games with him, tired of mixed signals and defensiveness. He’d openly admitted to her that night that he was terrified of being close to her because of how she made him feel.
 
And just a few moments before, he’d told her he still had feelings for her. He hadn’t elaborated on those feelings, but she was almost positive, and maybe it was just a vibe she was getting from him, that his feelings were more than friendly.
 
She took a breath. “Can we start over? Can we just pretend that we don’t have this long, complicated past, and that you’re just a good friend that I enjoy spending time with?”
 
“Yeah, I think we could do that.”
 
Spike didn’t know how well this would work out for either of them, but he was going to give it his best shot, and hopefully that would be enough.
---------------------------
 

 
<<     >>