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Business as usual by Lilachigh
 
Chp 34 Changing Sides
 
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Business as Usual

Chapter 34 Changing Sides



“So, will you baby-sit for us tonight? Please?”

Agnes looked up from her mixing-bowl and sighed. It was hard to say no to Shona, especially when she was wearing her pleading expression. But she was so busy at the moment and it really wasn’t convenient.

“You know how fond the kids are of you and Mike and me never get a chance to go out together without them. It’s too dangerous to leave them on their own all night.”

Agnes added more butter to her pastry and rubbed the mixture through her cold fingers. The Pattersons were one of a very few whole vampire families living in Sunnydale. They’d arrived, as so many others had done, to watch the last apocalypse: then, sadly for them, because they had promised the kids such a good time, the Slayer had defeated Glory. The majority of the apocalypse tourists had left but the Patterson were among those who had found a nice cave, moved in and stayed.

“I suppose I can ask Clem to look after the Willow Tree for the first couple of hours,” Agnes said, cross with herself for giving in so easily. “But you must be home by three a.m. It gets so busy in here around then and Clem, sweet as he is, is a soft touch for a hard luck story and I find most of my cakes have been given away.”

Shona smiled with relief. “Oh yes, we’ll be home by three, I promise! We just want to have a little time together. You know!”

Agnes busied herself with rolling out her pastry and pretended she hadn’t heard. But she was well aware that four vampires living in one cave didn’t leave a lot of room for privacy, especially when two of them were aged ten and eight.

It was obviously extremely rare that a whole family was turned, rose and stayed together. Couples, yes, but not the children. When they were killed – and Agnes could find no good reason for any vampire to do that; after all there were always people around whose death wouldn’t be mourned! – they were rarely turned. In the case of the Pattersons, whatever vampire had been responsible had obviously gone through their house, feeding and turning each of them, one after the other. Their families had buried them in the same grave and so they’d had no problem finding each other – afterwards.

Agnes liked Shona very much, but wasn’t quite as fond of Mike, her husband. She thought he was one of those vampires who, although fairly newly risen, thought he knew everything about his new way of life. He’d been a mathematics teacher Before and was keen on explaining to Agnes how she could make her business more successful.

Agnes had heard that he’d started his own enterprise recently, advising demons and vampires on how to invest their money. She’d tried telling Shona a few days ago when she called into the Willow Tree with the children that this was not a good idea – a demon and his money should never be parted – but she’d just laughed and said that Mike was a law to himself and she didn’t like to interfere.

“Anyway, it stops him getting under my feet all day long,” she’d added, nibbling on a chocolate éclair and watching the children munch their way through blood flavoured Angel cake.

Now, as Agnes swiftly cut out the bases of her jam tarts, she asked, “Have you managed to find the children another teacher yet?”

Shona shook her head. “No, Mike can teach them their sums, but they’re too young to learn the sort of maths he did Before and that annoys him. They can read and write, of course, and we’ll just have to muddle through as best we can. To be honest, Agnes, I’m not too worried about that part of their lives. It’s – ” she hesitated and picked up some spare pieces of pastry to mould between her fingers. “At the end of the day, our biggest worry is feeding them!”

Agnes swiftly added strawberry jam mixed with blood into each tart and popped them in the oven. Of course feeding the children was a problem. That was why so many turned children faded away soon afterwards. Oh they could feed if they were lucky and found someone sleeping, but even then there was the likelihood of that person waking up and fighting off the child.

“They like pig blood, don’t they?”

Shona sat on the table, swinging her legs. “Thank goodness, yes! You should see the problems Rebecca Mossiman two caves along has with her little girl! But it’s so expensive! The butchers charge twice as much for pig as they do for cow or sheep.”

Agnes tutted angrily. “I know! There should be a law against that. It’s profiteering.”

“I was wondering if you might have a word with Spike about it? He likes the kids, doesn’t he? I know he’s always busy and I wouldn’t want to bother him, but if he could just speak to the butchers, it might help.”

Agnes sighed. Just recently she seemed to have become a sort of go-between for vampires and demons who wanted to ask Spike a favour. It wasn’t that she minded, just that she had a business to run.

Much later that night, she surveyed her two charges and wondered if motherhood was, indeed, the wonderful experience she had always believed it to be. The children, awake for about two hours, had devoured their breakfast – and she had to thank Spike for the Weetabix and blood hint – read books and played games. Agnes had inspected the hole where one of Nancy’s baby teeth had fallen out, and been lectured in a kindly fashion by Eric on the rules of American football.

The children were now sitting, moodily kicking the table legs.
Eric and Nancy were not looking their best. They were pale, skinny children, wearing T-shirts, jeans and baseball caps worn backwards. They both had dark hair like their mother's; they both needed a good wash. Agnes knew how hard it was to keep yourself clean when you were a vampire and realised that caring for two little ones must be difficult, but still…. Her fingers itched to braid Nancy’s hair.

“Stop kicking the table, dear.”

“I’m bored, Aunt Aggie.”

“I’m bored as well,” Nancy said

“How about reading to me from your nice book.”

Eric scowled. “It’s a stupid book. I want to watch TV.”

Agnes shook her head. “You know your father’s rules. No TV on weekdays during the night. You can have it on for an hour before you go to bed tomorrow morning.”

Eric sighed. “Can we go out, then, Aunt Aggie? It’s dark enough.”

Agnes hesitated. One of Shona’s rules for babysitting was that the children stayed in the cave. But Agnes didn’t think she was right. She could tell that both children were suffering from living in the cramped quarters of their cave for hour after hour. They needed to run about, play, let off steam. “Well…”

“We could go on the swings again!” Nancy said, her eyes shining. She wrapped her arms round Agnes’ waist and beamed up at her, lovingly. “There’s no kids in the playground at night, Aunt Aggie. You told us that, remember?”

Agnes made up her mind. The children needed exercise and, as Nancy said, the playground would be empty. Half an hour on the swings and climbing frame would burn off a lot of their repressed energy and their mother need never know. Adult vampires could hunt and kill if they felt bored – children couldn’t.

She scurried along behind the children as they ran, whooping and yelling, along the underground passages. She was always amazed how they could find their way, unerringly choosing the right tunnel when the path divided. She had been in Sunnydale a long time and still had to think in case she got lost.

The cool air on her face announced they had reached the entrance. The children stopped and looked back for her. Agnes smiled: they were good children at heart. She’d been teaching them their Safety Code for weeks, every time she looked after them. Stop, Look, Listen, Scent, Listen, Scent Again and if all clear and dark, you can go Outside.

She straightened Nancy’s jacket, rubbed dirt off Eric’s face with her hanky and then watched as they raced across the empty playground.

Agnes followed them slowly, enjoying the night air on her face, the smell from the flowering bushes planted along the borders wafting over her. Eric was hanging upside down from the climbing rails and Nancy was swinging, working herself higher and higher.

“Oh look. A whole family to stake. I haven’t done a whole family before!”

Agnes spun round in shock. The Slayer, wearing a bright red top, tight jeans and a wide smile, was standing in front of her, holding a stake in her hand! Agnes backed away. Oh God, the children! She had to protect the children. And why hadn’t she sensed the Slayer was there?

“I’m Buffy. I’m the Slayer. I’m here to kill you.” The slim, jaunty figure stepped forward confidently and Agnes took another step backwards.

This was ridiculous. The Slayer was dead, buried deep in Sunnydale Cemetery. Suddenly something clicked inside Agnes’ head. This wasn’t the real Slayer! This was that – that thing that Spike had had made a year ago. His sex toy! No wonder she hadn’t sensed it’s presence; it was a robot!

“Good evening, Buffy. We’ve met before. Remember? My name’s Agnes Pringle, Spike’s friend.”

“Spike? Spike’s my lover. Oh, no, Willow says not lover. Willow says I must kill all vampires. Stand still, Agnes Pringle. Let me kill you quickly. Then I can kill the little vampires. Vampires are bad. Vampires must die!”

“Children!” Agnes’ voice sounded strained and old as she tried to make it sound as calm as she could. “Eric, Nancy, I want you to run away, now. Do you hear me? Eric, don’t go home. Find a tunnel deep down where you can both hide. Now, run!”

She stepped forward, brandishing her handbag. She knew it wouldn’t step the robot, but it might give the children just a few more seconds to escape. And, a bitter little thought flew through her head, at least you won’t be here to tell Shona that you nearly got her children staked!

Agnes heard the chains of the swing rattle and hoped Eric had Nancy safe. He was a good boy; he’d look after his sister – “Oh no!” She gasped as two little bodies sped past her and two small figures crouched between her and the robot. Both children were in full game face, Nancy’s fangs were even showing through the space her baby tooth had left.

The robot Buffy looked surprised, then laughed and flung herself forward just as there was a roar, a flying figure in black leather and the stake in her hand was sent spinning across the ground.

“Spike!” Agnes shimmied her face back to normal and reached out to pull the children close to her. She knew she didn’t have a heartbeat, but was convinced she could still feel it racing in her chest.

“Spike! My lover. Oh no, my friend.” The robot lay on her back, smiling up at the vampire standing over her. “Why did you stop me, Spike. I must kill vampires. I am programmed to kill.”

Spike threw Agnes an anxious glance. “You OK? Kids OK? Bloody hell, they were brave. She didn’t touch you, did she?”

Agnes shook her head, still trying to find her voice. “It’s….it’s that robot creature, isn’t it?”

Spike nodded. “We call it the Buffybot. Willow’s given it an overhaul. She goes out patrolling, but not on her own. One of us is always with her. I’m sorry, Aggie. She slipped away from me after her last kill.”

“You should have told me she was out at night,” Agnes said, smoothing Nancy’s hair back from her face.

For a moment, Spike looked ashamed. “Sorry! We didn’t want the demons and vamps to know the Slayer’s dead.” He turned to Buffybot. “This is Agnes Pringle. She is my friend. You will not stake Agnes. Repeat after me…you will not stake Agnes Pringle, ever!”

“I will not stake Agnes Pringle ever.”

“That’s good. Oh and you won’t stake kids, either. That’s just – well, it’s beneath you, Buffy.”

Agnes ushered a strangely quiet Eric and Nancy towards the tunnel entrance. All she wanted was to get the children safely home. This was all her fault. She’d thought she’d known better than their mother and she’d been wrong. She’d almost got them killed: she knew she would never forgive herself for this evening. Thank God Spike had been there to save them.

But as the three of them stumbled along the tunnel towards the Patterson cave, Agnes knew that as well as worrying about what had nearly happened, she wanted to understand what Spike had meant when he said, “We didn’t want the demons and vamps to know the Slayer’s dead.”? ‘We’ meant he’d linked himself with humans once more. He was growing further and further apart from the vampire community. Agnes realised as she hurried the children into the cave, lit candles, made sure they changed their shoes and produced a box of cherry cookies for them to eat with their warmed pigs’ blood, that this was the reason she was constantly being asked to pass on messages to Spike now. The vampire community no longer had a leader. He had gone over to the other side.

“Should we tell Mom and Dad about what happened tonight?” Eric asked through a mouthful of cookie. “We won’t if you don’t want us to, Aunt Aggie.”

Agnes looked at him affectionately. They had both been so brave and none of it had been their fault. “I think we’d better confess, don’t you?” she said. “It was all my fault. Not ours. And you shouldn’t have secrets from your parents and anyway – “ she gestured to where Nancy was curled up, fast asleep on the sofa, “you know what a gossip your sister is! I don’t think the secret would be secret for long, do you?”

Eric nodded seriously and, because he hadn’t asked, Agnes switched on the television – she would argue with Mike and Shona when they got back. The reception was bad down here, but the cartoons needed little explanation.

Agnes sat on the sofa with a sleeping child on either side of her. She glanced at the clock and frowned. Four am. Really, Mike and Shona were naughty. They had promised to be back by three. A noise at the cave entrance brought her out of a little doze. Agnes stared as Shona came in through the curtains hanging across the opening.

She was covered in mud, her face scratched, her hair a tangled mess. There was blood on her hands and arms but it was the look in her eyes that brought Agnes to her feet – an expression of such pain and loss that the air in the cave seemed to darken.

“Shona, my dear, what’s happened?”

The vampire girl looked at Agnes as if she didn’t recognise her. “Mike’s gone. Staked to dust. The Slayer killed him.”


tbc

























 
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