bravo. very well done, thank you for the fine read.

I'm glad she finally told him. WHat an emotional conversation. I'm really impressed with the honesty, and the fact that because of the change Spike can ask for what he really wants, which is just her. Finally Buffy allowed herself to see all that is there, and had been there all along if she had just opened herself up to it. You have to love that out of everything Spike remembered it was his love for her that seemed the most natural

I got so teary eyed that I had to finish reading the chapter with the words all blurry :(

I've often thought that Buffy was in love with Spike all along. Most of the stories that I've read have Buffy realize that she loves him but not admit that she did all along, even in Season 6. It's nice to see her realize what the rest of us knew all along :-)

It makes sense that Spike's first memories would be of his love for Buffy and her rejection of him. He'd remember love, of course, as Buffy points out. He'd remember her rejection because all he knew after Xander shot him in the head was that he was a worthless, evil, monster who only deserved to be beaten and tortured. So, in this story, the natural progression would be for Spike to conclude that Buffy wouldn't love him because he's a monster.

Beautiful, touching chapter. The only complaint I have is she didn't kiss him! (I know you're building up to something here; I'm just being impatient.) Anyway, thanks for the lovely update and please give us another chapter soon. :)

Reader forgives writer for monstrous cruelty since she let Buffy say the magic words. But, will Spike believe her? Maybe if he gets a little bite.

Well done. Now maybe the healing can begin. I am glad that Buffy was honest with Spike and herself.

That chapter was good for the soul.

You right a very captivating story. I got all teary, and I don't cry at stories. I am glad that she told him the truth, but I wish she could have gotten through after she came back from the dead. Maybe he wouldn't be so desperate to have her love him if he knew what a monster SHE had been to him.

That was an emotionally wrenching chapter. Great update. Can't wait for more.

Such a good chapter -- their mutual sensitivity and honesty was very affecting!

Epiphany at last! I think for her more so than for him. Well written, neither schmoopy nor unrealistic.

Well, she finally admits it. Not only that is how she feels now, but how she always has. But where do they go from here?

yay! no denial!
This chapter was so amazingly sweet.
This broken version of spike doesn't have any defenses and wears his heart on his sleave (even more than the normal spike version) I'm glad buffy recognized this and didn't crush his heart. I'm also glad she finally listened to her own heart :)

your writing skills are amazing, thank you so much for the fast updates

This chapter ad me tearing up a few times. A great chapter, especially when Spike said "how could I forget?" and when Buffy broke down.

“How could I forget?”
God, one line and you had me crying right along with them. Beautiful, beautiful chapter.

wow great chapter

i could just kiss you! this is absolutely beautiful! How difficult that must have been for Buffy to basically tell someone she loved that 'yes, you were a monster, but have changed so much!' I say good for Spike for taking the first step & putting his heart on the line, so that Buffy can now start the process of getting 'her man' back - now that he can truly understand what he means to Buffy.

Bravo!

Okay, I don't cry much as a general rule...but at least three times I teared up or sobbed a bit during this chapter...Bravo, my dear, bravo... More,please?

about time you admitted it buffy. to bad it took xander blowing spike's brains almost out for you to see but about time. i wonder if spike believes her. great chappie dos.

Whew! Emotional chapter here hon! Yes that is what Spike's every effort was screaming, "Please love me even if I don't deserve it."

Naturally Spike would remember love just as Buffy realized at last. The core of the being (William and Spike) was always love and pleasing the object of his love. He was as evil as possible to please Dru and Angelus and as good as should have been IMpossible for the love of Buffy.

Now she'll have to tell him about her resurrection and the year of hell. He needs to tell her about the things Xander SAID to him as well as did.....

Excellent (I've been looking all day hoping for an update *G*). Thanks!

Kathleen

freaking FINALLY buffy says something smart.

*gasp* wow.... oh my... that was just.. very moving..

That was a hard but so important road for her to travel down. Of course Spike would remember love. Again, thanks to Angel, for him helping Spike in finding the memories enough to ask those two simple question's. She finally let her guard down and allowed herself to feel the love she has for him, to see thing's as are really are. Awesome chapter, thank you so much. Going to read it again!

It's about time Buffy realised just how cruel she was being! :(

At least she finally admitted that she loves him.

Now I'm wondering exactly what does Spike remember. Great update, you got me all misty-eyed.

I'm going to go curl up in the corner and cry now. So sad, that the memory that first made sense to Spike was the "I could never be your girl"/hellacious beating. But, also happiness that Buffy had gumption. Beautiful chapter!

Excellent in the depiction of raw heart wrenching emotion! I'm a mess of goo. Of course, I love the ending especially.

OH! SO happy! You are letting Buffy grow up and change, instead of locking her into being the girl she was when she "broke up" with Spike on the show. I loved her realization that "There was no option but to tell him the truth." She hates it, she knows what might happen to her new relationship with Spike, but she does it anyway, because it's the RIGHT thing to do.
I hope that whatever happens with her plan, he remembers this raw, honest moment, and believes her.
It seems that Xander has gone down so far, and everyone else is being lifted to higher levels of themselves.
I'm starting to wonder what Willow is going to do when Buffy tells her that her "broken yellow crayon" friend has gone crazy. Once Xander is exposed, will she believe, or will she join him? He must be taken out of the group in one way or another. (I see him as a sort of cancer in this story. A disease that needs to be surgically removed. It's weird.) Maybe she'll just stay in denial - which will probably make Buffy place her in the camp with Xander, as far as keeping her in her life.
I'm definately in teh "Xander has to be punished" crowd, but...they've all done stuff that could end the world, even Buffy. Can Xander be punished for his crimes and get help for his obvious mental problems? Could he return to the group like Willow did in the show? Is there a possibility of redemption for anyone, no matter who they are, no matter what they have done?
And THERE is what makes this such a good story - it makes us think so much - not just about the world you are writing in, but the one we live in, too.

awwwwww... I loved this chapter. It was so heart wrenching, you made me feel like I was really there watching the scene play out. I'm glad we're getting to the good stuff now :) I was holding out for some sweet Spuffy moments. And you definitly delivered!! Love your work as always. Excellent stuff :) Can't wait for the next chapter!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've got to admit, you had me on tenterhooks at the close of last chapter, but handled the "big question" with remarkable skill. My hat's off to you.

Well, I guess he's got enough at the moment to get the gist....it'd be too much right now to go into the whole sexual explanation, too.
With how much he picked up from one feeding of Angel, how much more will the pathways reconnect with another?

And, he finally got it out of her....except that this Spike can't completely appreciate what this confession truly is, without all the history of Buffy he knows, as well as their history. It's a precious thing, certainly, but he can't know how hard won her words were. Yet.

So, how soon is the Xander confrontation? Will they let him get more complacent.....let Spike heal more? Or is it today?

YEA!!!!!!!!!!!!

(doin the snoopy dance) YEA!!!!!

Great chapter! I am so glad she finally admitted it to him! Just what he needed to hear!

Thank you!