Hi ,just wanted to let you know how much I loved and totally enjoyed reading this story. It gripped me from the start. So many twists and turns. A very roller coaster of emotions. My heart just broke for Spike :( I cried through many chapters. You wrote each character so strongly and so well. I loved Angel being in true Sire mode and being there to support his childe. I'm sorry to see it end. Any chance of a sequel? Spike came through his ordeal to some degree,but I'm glad it was realistically dealt with that sometimes you never get over but you find a way to move on.

Again with that honesty thing!  You didn't let Buffy off the hook before, but now, when Spike threatened to retreat into himself in fear, you didn't let him off either.  And in the end all isn't perfect...  But there is joy.  Just like life. 

Outstanding.

Blue

Text This was wonderful. Tender and exciting and fulfilling. Don't stop writing.

That was fantastic! I love that you didn't just wave a magic wand and make it all better. It felt more real.

 After two days of nonstop reading, I have finally come to the end of this beautiful tale. Thanks so much for it. It was one of the best stories I have ever read, from the pain and heartache to love and sweetness. It was all around amazing. :)

Thank you for such a wonderful story. Like nothing I have ever read before. I had such a hard time dealing with Xander as the abuser. I actually almost prayed it wasn't him in the beginning. I adore Xander, but I am well aware of his faults, especially with his views about demons....so I can believe he is capable of these acts. I love how you basically took the basic "lessons" of the show and fully explored them here. Spike and Buffy basically went through this same process on the air, but Joss and Co didn't have the leisure to really delve into it as you did.  I am glad you took the challenge to explore the painful consequences of being abused (Spike) and being an abuser (Buffy).  We got to watch them heal in a complete and meaningful way that was an intense rollercoaster read, and also a nice companion to the emotions during season 7. 

This story has taken me on an emotional journey, and I've loved every second of it. Everything was perfect and I can honestly say that this is the best fanfiction that I have ever read. Thank you for the pleasure of reading such an amazing piece of work.

your talent with words is soooooooooo... its beyond me to compliment it. And you really make me believe it was Riley!
Ty for teh story!!!

Wow. That was incredibly creepy (in the good way of course! :D). It took me a long time to finish it... I actually intended to read it all in one shot but being up at 4:30 on a school night is just not cricket! (lol sorry I'm Aussie!)

Yes it was creepy, but I just happen to have a morbid sense of interest. It is hard to see Spike so weak and helpless, yet you wrote im perfectly in that role! You really had to of been made of stone not be in tears in most parts!

I knew it was Xander from the very beginning, not because you weren't tricky but I've realised that a lot of fanfic writers usually like to make him a baddie lol (I personally like Xander, but it was hard to like him in this fic!). It was hard to feel sorry for him after his grusome acts, even though you aptly described a tortured childhood in itself for Xander. In all, a really good and bloody addictive fic! Well Done!!

OMG!!!!!!!!
This is one of the best fanfic I've ever read, if not THE best!
The first chapter I thought of Xander, but then I was almost convinced Riley was the torturer... only to find the incredible truth!!
I loved the fact that Spike decided to finally step up and started demanding a fair relationship, I absolutely loved how he stopped for a second to consider it and fought his near self-destructive love for Buffy.
Definetly one of the best!!! :D
Congratulations!!

ooohhhh....that was really touching!  you are such an AMAZING author!.. i cried and cried and cried reading this...that's how much touched i was.  GREAT JOB!!!!! you are officially my favorite author!!!

My god, this story was incredible.  So amazingly paced and just... wonderful all the way through.

Wonderful Read and I very much like the how you kept with your idea of how a very long time and terrible emotional trauma is still to be lived through - that Buffy and Spike still have a very difficult time ahead. And I like the location for your ending - real life and real life monsters have to be lived with, not like the movie monsters that are left and forgotten once the movie is over. Plus all the "is this a date?" also, at least for me, keeps the emotional insecurity of Buffy plus kept the idea that she still has a lot of maturity to come in her life and their relationship. The "Date" thing always reminds me of a teenage girl or Buffy being stuck in the "I want normal" or a denial of the real way life works - the complexity of all the shades of gray.

Regarding the comments that you left a lot of your previous plot and characters without conclusion - At least for me, by the end of the story it was Spike that was the main theme - Would he be able to reach out and find his love and trust again? What the other characters were doing, while it might have been interesting, was not especially important to me. And while exploring more of their storylines - it could also have simply added a lot of additonal, but not needed material. Of course, that is just my opinion - I am sure that people who actually write have a very different perspective. The one thing that I did feel that I wanted more on was Willow's attempted at killing Xander - I would have like to have had a little more depth and exploration from the personal perspective of Willow on her again falling into The Dark Magic - wonder if a set of ficlets on the other characters might be an interesting addition -

Thanks for the wonderful story -

Im going to pee myself.

I've got cramp in my right foot.

A crick in my neck.

A lump in my throat.

Tears in my eyes.

Im Desperate For Nicotine.

Its 2.33 am.

And it took me 4 Hours to read this story...



But It Was A Blood Brilliant One At That...

Ah, I know how to touch a nerve :P

Yes, if you were going for an open-ended feel, then this chapter works perfectly, and rereading it, I will say that it does a perfect job of that. It reflects the situation and relationship perfectly.

And while I will give you Willow (it makes perfect sense as you put it) I will always challenge that a little more could have been done to resolve Buffy's violent streak. Even a few more lines talking about Dawn giving her the silent treatment for the shove would have worked to wrap that up, though not as much as I would have prefered (yea, ok, I wanted to see more Buffy angst, ala Blood Bound...or is it Bond...I can never remember :/)

And don't get a big head. Yea, it was one of your best works, but that doesn't mean you are above critics! :D (we already remember what happens when someone says someone else is beneath them!)

I fianlly got around to reading the end of this story (after giving my self a break from reading fan fics)

There is an old saying, I believe Poe said it: If you have a gun on the mantle in chapter 4, someone better fire it before the end.

While you did a wonderful job with the Spike and Buffy section, you left the gun on the table. Many things you set up were forgotten. Dawn andBuffy's relationship, Willow's blinders, the gangs Demon=bad, human=good belief, Buffy as an abuser...all fell aside so you could have a happy ending.

Another person already mentioned, you let most of them fall away at the end, when they played such a large role in the story.

There is another saying in storytelling, as said by Viggo Mortensen: "Sometimes, the writer must take out debts to further the story, and finds they must pay them in the final section." You took out massive debts, and failed to pay up. A true shame, as I know you are a better writer then this. Infact, I think this is the only story I've seen you do where you didn't pay up your dues.

I get the feeling you got tired of this story and decided to just end it fast, so you could be done with it. If that is the case, just say so. I can respect an author that hits a brick wall but decides to put an ending up to satisfy fans. Its when you fail to finish all the storylines that the story comes off as rushed and cheap.

I know most people will ignore these faults and only see the happy ending, and I do not fault them. it is a wonderful ending. But because there are atleast 5 chapters missing between it and chapter 66, this story will always remain, in my mind, unfinished.

I only hope your newest story (which I haven't reviewed yet but is very very good) will live up to your previous work and finish all the story lines.

WoW! I started reading this late Thursday night and finally finished it. Great story line! In the later years of the show I had grown to dislike Xander and is attitude towards everyone who thought differently than he did. I really like how you portrayed him as the evil villian, mainly because in some strange way I could totally see his character in seasons 6-7 turning into what he was in this story. Very very good!

I can't believe it's over...so lovely, so sweet, so wrenching...what an incredible journey this story has been. I don't have words.

Thank you so much, and I can't wait for your next story!

Very sweet ending. Hard to believe this is where they ended up, considering how it started and everything they went through, but I'm glad they made it there. Looking forward to your next fic!

This is just a gorgeous ending to an incredible fic! Though I am sad it's over, I think you gave it the perfect ending. Love the tenderness between them and the reality of Spike's emotions. There are just not enough words for how much I *loved* this, amazing job! :)

one nitpick -- the ending of the story would have been more satisfying to me if dawn, giles, angel, willow and even xander hadn't all disappeared so completely.

except for a few brief appearances by dawn, we don't know if spike and giles have come to any better anderstanding, how willow feels about everything, if spike and angel are continuing a supportive family relationship -- there's no follow-through on any of those subsplots.

Wonderful story, DOS. I was hoping you'd set up a situation where Buffy would be forced to choose again and would choose Spike this time over Willow or Giles or Angel. I think it would have to be one of them to balance out her failure to save Spike from Xander. Sure you wouldn't like to add another 30-40 chapters.

aww what a sweet ending..

Oh no. The end. I can't believe it's over :( I have enjoyed every word of this great ride, from trying to figure out whodunnit to debating the characters' motivations to, well, everything :P. Thank you so much for this wonderful, gut-wrenching, powerfully real tale. I hope that you are proud of your accomplishment. This is the first of your stories that I have read, but if the rest are even half as good, I'm going to enjoy catching up until you start us on our next adventure :)

to borrow from the chapter title, sweet read, thank you.

claIm...
no shellfish.

Well.
You wrung our emotions, twisted our expectations, shocked us. It was sometimes even hard to know who to cheer for, you'd messed with our heads so much. That was one heck of a ride you took us on, DoS. Thank you.
I was surprised at the clam in the final chapter - didn't expect it. It was, however, beautifully done.
Looking forward to the next one... :)

Ah. Sweet happy ending. :) Good job, sweetie.

I am so sorry to see this story end (and isn't this short for one of yours? ::grin::).

Still, it was a lovely ending. I like the image of them slowly moving forward, finding their own strength in each other.

I thought I told you I didn't want this to end.:(

This story rocked and I wish that there were more. Will there be a sequel? I hope so.

Great stuff. Can't wait to read what you have in store for us next.

I really liked this story. Although, sometimes the angst was too much for me. But I liked how you wrote their reconciliation because every chapter weeks and sometimes months elapsed. You really showed the growth of Spike and Buffy in this story. Thank you.

Very good job on this story. I thought the ending was quite good - and realistic because it demonstrated that with time things will get better but it takes love and patience to get there.

LOVELY - Thanks, again for sharing this fabulous story.

Very powerful ending. Liked the imagery behind his reclaiming part of himself through his claim with her. How through taking her strength through her blood he is able to find his own strength. It seems they have found an effective way to deal with all that has happened, and even though he still has lingering pains from his ordeal(and clearly he still would) they are able to work on putting it behind them and moving towards a healthy freedom together.

I hate that this great story is over but I am so glad that they finally made it truly back to each other. She is really there for him when he needs it. She put herself out there for him when he claimed her. And their connection has allowed some of the nightmares to come few and far between. I really hate they he had to go through this but it was a journey that both of them had to go through evidently and they are in a better, healthier relatioinship for it. AWESOME STORY, even the parts where I wanted to strangle Xander and even Buffy for him having to go through any of that again. But loved every bit of it deep down.

Wow! Great ending to a great Story! So when will you start a new one? :D

Beautiful

Beautiful ending. And very realistic. His nightmares wouldn't just go away .it's something that would take time to heal.

Never, ever lose faith in your ability to write - because you have such an incredible talent. Beautiful end to a beautiful tale. Looking forward to what you have in store for us next :-)

Wonderful story as always. I loved it.

THATS THE END?? NO! EVIL! MUST HAVE MORE!!

awwwwwwwwwwww!

Great ending! Great story! All the way threw!

Thank you~!

Lovely ending chapter to a great story. I'm so glad they ended up together and that Spike are improving (even if it's going slow) from the torture.

Thanks for the epilogue, it was the icing on the cake. Loved that he claimed her and how it's helping him to heal. What an amazing journey you've had us on, it's been a real treat. Are you taking a much deserved break or is your muse still in overdrive? Looking forward to your next fic, DOS, thanks again.

It's rare to read about the beauty of their connection through the claim. Buffy's growth and Spike's recovery finish off the tale of gruelling struggle perfectly. It's been a great ride.

This story has been perfectly told from start to finish. You always evoke so many emotions and this one hit just about everyone's buttons (in the story and the readers as well).

Love the hopeful note on which you ended things. No "perfect" and too pat "all is well now" hopeful, but a real mature "I'll be there for you and you for me" hope. There is real unselfish love shown and that's right where things should be. Buffy is acting from love, putting Spike's needs over hers and realizing the motive she has. Spike always did that. They are finally on the same page and the book is lovely.

Well done, sweetie. This is a masterpiece. Thanks for sharing with us.

Kathleen

Well, what a contrast to the beginning of this story. None of them would have said that we would have mated Spuffy now.....and the future seems bright.

What a perfect ending to such a lovely story.You have kept me captivated from the first chapter to the last.Well done:)

Yeah.. smutty-endings are always nice to read *grin* but in this fic... with everything that happened... it just wouldn't have felt... right. It wouldn't have fit in with the story. The tender, loving sweetness between them hit the spot tho :) loved it loved it loved it

*sigh* wow, that was just... wow. I could've handled seeing a little more Spike n Buffy smuttyness, but this ending just seemed.... right. The perfect finish for your brilliant fic. I couldn't've stopped reading, even if I'd wanted to... it was just too darn good! Congrats on finishing! *waiting patiently for your next fic to begin* :)

That was one heck of a story. There were times when I was tempted to abandon it... it bordered on too much (I'm a little protective of our darling vampire, it seems), but I've seen it through to conclusion.

Well done, sweetie.