Gah... WONDERFUL!! Fabulous angsty start. I love it. Off to read some more.

I have to say, rarely, do I read a post NFA fic. Two or three is all but I love you're writing so much I thought I'd give it a try. Took me by surprise to see that it's finished already. Guess that means I get to finish it this evening. Yes, why now? Glad she's had to carry around the guilt of those last words to him. Now to get going with the rest.

reading this has been on my to-do list since i found out about it, and i'm thrilled to finally have a little bit of time to sit down with it. i've wanted to wait until i was really sure i could pay good attention, you know?

i'm already in love.

what i love most is that you've written something so wrenching without pushing. buffy's account of the l.a. battle, and of finding out that spike was blinked out again and she'd been left entirly out of the loop, is held up by a steady foundation of details--the unknown dead she felt responsible for in l.a., andrew's broken nose, the fact that every day he didn't come for her.

and now that he's back, she's excersizing this numbness to try to protect herself from the possibility of so much pain. of course she is.

spot on.

What a great start to this. I think one of the most effective things about this intro chapter for me was the setting itself. I really like stories that take Buffy and Spike out of a familiar setting, and the snow here almost felt like a third character. They're meeting on unfamiliar ground in unfamiliar weather, both strangers to each other after so long. It surprises me that Buffy would have mourned for him so acutely for so long, but i'm sure that will be explored more later. Who knows what she's been up to these last 10 years.

Reader stamps her foot. Bad Spike!

I thought I read this before but I didn't love it.

Love your story very much, but Spike is being an egoistic, self-centered Uber-asshole. I hope Buffy runs right after him and kicks his ass. He can´t be the big no. 1 in her life immediately after staying away for 10 (!!!) years, so he has to leave? Moron.

Fantastic. I especially liked the way you ended the flashback-y sequence. Very Buffy.

great start, thank you. "But why?" should be an enjoyable read to find out why he is back now. and will buffy tell him the truth?

ok, edge of my seat here - don't leave me hanging! :)
Your beginning has amazing promise. Can't wait to see it fulfilled.

Hmm, why didn't Spike ever seek her out? Or did he, but wasn't allowed to see her? So many possibilities.
Nice beginning, looking forward to reading more.

Can't wait for more. Buffy is a mature woman now and not such a little girl with little girl dreams. She has the benefit of being able to see the treasure she had and didn't appreciate.

Look forward to them finding each other again and doing it right.

I can't blame him for not going to her....she gave him no real reason to believe those words (not in the space of time he had to digest them) and nothing afterward to indicate they were meant. Angel chiseled away at any confidence he might have had that she ahd meant those words and the Immortal sighting (no matter the comics say it wasn't her they thought it was)capped it. Spike finally took her at her word that it would never be him and you can't blame him for that.

This is very, very promising and I am stoked!

Kathleen

Off to a wonderful, angsty start, E. I'll be looking forward to the next chapter.

wow...you've really captured buffy's hurt and confusion and finally resignation over the past decade....very well done, love, i've thoroughly enjoyed this first chapter...looking forward to more :)

That kinda broke my heart (in a good way, I guess). And I don't know why.

I actually shy away from post end of series fics, but I saw this was by you and I had to read.

It was of course, wonderfully well written and got me hooked straight away.

Cannot wait for more.

*But why?*

Why indeed? I'm hooked!

Ooo, interesting....

And I like that Buffy's been grieving all these years, finally getting that her cowardice cost her what she truly wanted in life. Good question, though.....why now?

Hmmm, and what has everyone been doing in the intervening time?? Will Spike tell his secrets?Looking forward to more. Thanks!

Great start . I can't wait to see where you go with this.

And one of the things she might have done wrong was kissing Angel and then there's taking up with the Immortal after all the grief she gave Spike about normal.Maybe he's back because he wants closure.

Wow! Great start, Eowyn. "L’Oreal Iridescent Blonde" indeed :)

Really like how you pushed this so far into the future. Such a great concept and execution. Can't wait to find out how much Buffy's changed. Well done!

Good start. Why is Spike back? Looking forward to more.