full 3/4 1/2   skin light dark       
 
Of Light And Shadow by FetchingMadScientist
 
Taking It Back
 
<<     >>
 

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

AUTHOR'S NOTE: The "Big Scene" still needs to be tweaked. Hope this will tide you over. Enjoy!
****************************


The throes of the birth of this fragile peace will cause great pain, both in the heart, mind, and body. Many will parish to bring it to pass. The one of light and shadow faces the truth of the one that made him. - Prophecies of the Unhesines
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Buffy held him in her arms. Suddenly she didn’t care that they weren’t alone, or that Angel was outside. Spike was all that mattered. She kissed him deeply, and the way his body trembled, she knew she’d reached something that he’d tried to hide from her. She felt his shock and surprise melt and become a soft kind of worship.

The old dance made her dizzy, as his fingers began to remember the things she’d long denied. And, she was amazed too, to find that his fingers still trembled, as they lightly held her, as if he were afraid to wake from the dream he’d been granted.

As she pulled away for breath, a heavy, desperate whisper seeped into her heart, “Buffy please…” Spike pleaded, “Don’t…Don’t go…”

She nearly choked on the sadness and need that those words held and her mind screamed out- Spike, don’t do this! You don’t have to…God, please…Let me help…Let me do this. I could…I could… “Spike,” her voice shuddered as an idea began to form, “I know this is your fight, and if you have to do this…” she swallowed the rest of the thought, looking up at his darkened eyes; darkened from fear or from passion, she didn’t know but it didn’t matter. She watched as his chest heaved needlessly, and a smile played on her lips, “If you have to do this, I think I know something that might help. Or,” she shrugged, her eyes dancing, “It could piss Angel off even more, maybe so much that he’ll be off his game. Then you can get the upper hand…”

His curiosity piqued, he asked, “What’s that, Love?”

She pulled his ear to her lips and spoke.

Giles watched as the muted sadness and pleasure that had just begun to settle over Spike’s features became first shock, and then anger. Spike’s eyes locked with his, and he knew that somehow he had been remiss in training his Slayer.

Spike’s piercing gaze left him with no doubt. What she’d suggested could be deadly for them both. And as Spike began to lead Buffy, rather quickly, into the den and shut the door, he was sure of it.
*****************************************************************************

He had whipped her around so fast, that, when he released her hand, she nearly lost her balance, “Hey,” she said, indignantly, “I know you’re nervous but I didn’t peg you for a caveman!”

“How could you, Buffy?” he hissed at her, his eyes blazing, “After…”

“But that’s why!” she insisted, her voice rising in pitch, betraying her own fear, her eyes widening, “It makes sense! More sense now then it ever did when I…” she stopped, shocked that she would even bring it up. Way to be supportive, Buffy… she chided herself as she watched his jaw clench as he fought for control. As if he doesn’t have enough to worry about…

“When you what?” he asked through clenched teeth, his voice sounding as low and deadly as she’d ever heard it, “When you let him rip your throat out?”

“Spike, please…” she whimpered, her eyes stinging with tears and her chin quivering, “It might help.”

He shook his head, his anger fading as he saw how earnest she was. She hadn’t meant it as a slight. She had only meant to help.

His eyes downcast, he moved across the room, opening his arms waiting for her to let him hold her, “I’m sorry, Buffy,” he whispered as she fell softly against him once more, and his hands traced slow circles on her back, “Love,” he spoke softly, breathing in the scent of her hair, “do you even know what you’re asking, how powerful a thing this is?” he pulled her chin up so that he could see her eyes. He searched for understanding there in her eyes, but didn’t see enough, “No,” he decided, “If I didn’t make it back…It could hurt you, maybe even kill you, Buffy. A bond is a very powerful thing to a vampire. And once it’s done, it can’t be undone. There’s no such thing as divorce, when it comes to what you’re asking, Buffy. I can’t do it. I’ve already taken enough from you.”

Buffy felt a twinge of jealousy, “Then you and Drusilla…?”

“No,” he said quickly, wanting to comfort her, “It’s not that. Dru and I never… It’s just that…what you’re asking…” a wave of conflicting emotions swept over him as he searched for the right words. There was love- so much of that- and sadness and fear; fear that she didn’t know- that she couldn’t know what this meant to him. What she meant to him, “It’s like nothing else. If I did this, it would take so much out of you, Love. And, it hasn’t been…” his voice ebbed as what Travers had made him do to her came rushing back. He only remembered bits of it, but the taste of her blood still lingered on his tongue, and in the recesses of his memory. He closed his eyes and sighed, trying to push the memory out of his head. He didn’t know if he’d ever be able to tell her all of what had happened to him at Travers’s hand, but he did know that he couldn’t burden her with it now; especially now, “I can’t hurt you anymore, Buffy.”

He felt pressure at the small of his back as she held him tighter and she spoke softly and hopelessly to him, “Spike, if you do this…and you don’t come back…” Spike was amazed at how bright her eyes were. They were brighter than any star he’d seen in the night sky, “…you’d be killing me anyway. You don’t have to do this, Spike,” she closed her eyes and took comfort in his closeness, hoping that he understood what it was that she was trying to say, even if she didn’t understand it herself.

The silence that filled the room was unnerving. So unnerving, in fact, that she looked up at him and found him looking at her with wide eyes and his mouth agape, wearing an expression that could be described as a cross between “Yipe” and “Wow”, “So, what’s the verdict,” she asked, trying, not too successfully, to lighten the mood, “Is it ‘Yipe’ or ‘Wow’?”

“Neither,” he managed to say, and then, sighing, he added, “It’s a ‘No.’”

Buffy opened her mouth to protest, but Spike stopped it when he brushed a feather-like kiss across her lips, “But, thank you,” he whispered, “Can’t keep the Bit waiting,” he smiled at her as he turned to leave the room, “All that finery and such,” he shrugged, lingering by the door, “I have to make a good impression, don’t I?”

Suddenly she found herself alone again, hoping that she would see him again, and that she would be able to tell him what an idiot he was.

And, she hoped she could tell him, in big, bold, sky-high letters that she loved him.
 
<<     >>